A Morning That Made Me Stop
It was one of those mornings when I had a hundred things running through my head. I was walking fast through the streets of London, coffee in one hand and my phone in the other. My calendar was full, my mind already three hours ahead. Then, out of nowhere, I glanced at a shop window and caught my reflection.
I didn’t see someone who looked put-together or confident. I saw someone who looked like she was just… running. Rushing through life without really being there. That pause stopped me in my tracks. I realized I hadn’t checked in with myself in weeks.
That little moment taught me something: self-awareness doesn’t always come with a grand revelation. Sometimes it shows up when you least expect it, asking you to notice yourself again.
What Self-Awareness Feels Like
Self-awareness isn’t a fancy concept. It’s not about being perfect or analyzing every thought. It’s more like holding up a mirror and actually looking.
It’s asking yourself, “Why am I reacting this way?” or “What do I really need right now?” It’s being both the player and the coach of your own life. You’re still in the game, but you’re also learning how to play it better.
Have you ever had that feeling where you’re on autopilot, doing things just because everyone else is? That’s the opposite of self-awareness. When you’re aware, you pause, you notice, and you choose.
Why It Matters More Than You Think
The truth is, most of us think we know ourselves. But knowing your favorite food or your Enneagram type isn’t the same as true self-awareness.
Here’s why it’s worth building:
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It helps you make better choices. When you know what drives you, you stop chasing things that don’t align with your values.
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It makes relationships smoother. You notice your triggers before you blow up at someone, and you learn to communicate with honesty.
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It protects you from burnout. Instead of pushing until you break, you notice the signs and take care of yourself sooner.
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It makes life more joyful. You see the small wins, the funny moments, the random joys, instead of rushing past them.
Gen Z and young professionals have a lot on their plate. School, work, side hustles, pressure to succeed, pressure to look happy on Instagram. Self-awareness is like a secret weapon that helps you survive all that without losing yourself.
How to Start Cultivating Self-Awareness
1. Slow Down and Actually Notice
Awareness starts with slowing down. That could mean taking a walk without your phone, or noticing how your body feels before you sleep. Are your shoulders tight? Is your jaw clenched?
It doesn’t take hours. Even a few minutes of noticing can shift how you feel.
2. Journal Without Overthinking
During my university years, I was juggling a business and management major with a fine arts minor. My days were full of group projects, case studies, art critiques, and endless deadlines. Journaling became my escape.
I’d write without filters, just pouring out whatever was in my head. Later, I’d read back and realize I was carrying the same worries again and again. I also saw what gave me joy – painting, good conversations, moments of stillness.
Quick practice:
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Write for 10 minutes without editing yourself.
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End with one line: Today, I noticed that…
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Repeat. You’ll start spotting patterns in your thoughts and feelings.
3. Ask for Feedback, Even When It’s Hard
This part isn’t fun, but it’s powerful. I once asked a friend what she thought I overlooked about myself. She told me, gently, that I downplayed my achievements too much. At first, I brushed it off, but later it sank in. She was right.
Sometimes the people around you see your blind spots before you do.
How to try: Ask a close friend: What’s one thing I do well, and one thing I could work on? Then just listen. No excuses, no defenses.
4. Practice Mindfulness in Small Moments
Mindfulness isn’t about sitting in silence for hours. It’s about paying attention, here and now.
When you’re brushing your teeth, notice the foam and the minty taste. When you’re eating, actually taste the food instead of scrolling TikTok. When your mind wanders, bring it back.
Even five minutes of mindful breathing can make you feel more grounded.
5. Learn to Sit With the Messy Stuff
Self-awareness isn’t always pretty. Sometimes it shows you jealousy, insecurity, or fear. That’s okay. The goal isn’t to get rid of those feelings, it’s to notice them without letting them take over.
Try saying: This is jealousy. This is what it feels like. But it doesn’t control me.
Naming your feelings takes away some of their power.
Habits That Stick
Want to make awareness part of your everyday life? Start small.
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Ask yourself each night: What did I learn about myself today?
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Keep a “trigger journal” for moments when you overreact. Later, reflect on why.
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Celebrate small wins. Noticing when you need rest or water is self-awareness too.
A Story From Student Life
Back in college, I thought being successful meant saying yes to everything. I joined too many clubs, signed up for every group project, and filled my calendar until I had no space left.
I told myself I was lazy when I couldn’t keep up. But through self-awareness, I realized I wasn’t lazy at all – I was overcommitted. That shift changed everything. I started setting boundaries, asking for help, and giving myself grace.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re drowning in expectations, self-awareness can be your lifeboat. It reminds you that you don’t have to do it all, and you definitely don’t have to do it all at once.
The Science Behind It
Research shows that people with higher self-awareness are more confident, creative, and resilient. They handle stress better and build stronger relationships.
Here’s the kicker: most people think they’re self-aware, but only about 10–15 percent actually are. That means awareness isn’t automatic. It’s a skill, like training a muscle. The more you practice, the stronger it gets.
Self-awareness is about meeting yourself with honesty and curiosity. It’s about knowing when you’re tired, when you’re happy, when you need to step back.
The more you practice, the more you’ll feel at home in your own skin. And that’s the real gift: living a life that feels like it’s yours.